Within the week I was sharing my pains about some unhealthy needless demands, expectations, and practices emerging in our society (communities) relating to marriage with a friend. After an elaborate conversation, I told her, in the end, we will just have to all be the Lengdungs of our time. If you know this guy, you would be connecting the dots by now, but if you don't, permit me to try to describe him in a few sentences as a backdrop for what I want to share. Lengdung can be termed as a reformer of our time, a young guy obsessed with, knowledge, growth, and seeing the best in others, a challenger of the status quo of everything that is wrong with/in the society, a man who does all these and more pragmatically with his life. It would surprise you to know that he was among the few young men in Jos whose wedding went against the grain of culture and tradition.  Coming from one of the roughest ghettos in the Plateau State of Nigeria, characterized by high school dropouts and teenage

  Permit me to tell you a bit about Philip. I met Philip in our undergraduate days at the University of Jos. He was never late even though he usually comes from home. I tried several times to beat him in punctuality but I failed on several attempts. Philip was cheerful, full of life, and always the spark of the house.  Last week was a tough yet defining week for me, I lost Philip who has been a friend for 10 years. Did I see it coming? Certainly not. Was I anticipating it sooner? I doubt it. But will we all die? Of course yes.  This is not a tribute but be patient with me as I share with you the lessons I have learned at the cause of his demise this week. I have no doubt they will bless your heart. Philip lived well : I know people are often guilty of saying things about people who are gone that are not usually true, but with a deep sense of honesty, humility, and certitude, at 27, Philip lived well. This is no fallacy, this young man touched lives everywhere he went, if not with his s

  Over the last year, I have had quite a several job interviews, and one thing I kept in mind before those moments was "don't ever stop to be qualified for the job". The outcome of the interviews may not turn out to be what I wanted, but these interviews kept teaching me a great deal about life - to never stop being qualified for life.  I have engaged a lot of young people this year, and what I observed is alarming - young people want everything at no cost at all; they want to achieve their dreams on their beds, they detest getting out of their comfort zones. Sadly, it doesn't work like that.  What you want out of life determines the kind of effort, patience, doggedness, and preparation you give into it. You see, greatness comes at a price and it is not cheap at all. The truth is you don't get what you are not prepared for.  Dear young man/woman, who and where you will be tomorrow will not in any way be different from the preparation you are doing today. The great

  He looked me intently into the eyes, with humility and a great sense of urgency, and said: "young man, live your life now right, it is from its fruit you will eat tomorrow". You see, what you are doing with life now largely determines how your latter shall be, and who or what you are now is a reflection of what you have been doing with life. Life doesn't just happen, it is a deliberate venture. So after almost a year of writing and sharing, I had to take time out to refresh (oh how I enjoyed the break), I am glad I am back, so let's pick up from where we left, shall we? In my new year piece, I shared some random thoughts that I believed would be instrumental in our life's journey. I would like to recap them again to enable us to assess the progress of the first quarter of this year.  About making each day count : How intentional have you been in giving life your best shot every passing day? About being grateful : I learned that gratitude is a ladder, and on days

  I want to congratulate you for making it this new year, God has been faithful. Last year was tough, but we survived it, God kept us and we are here. We now have a clean slate of sheets, what we write on it determines how our lives will pan out at the end of the day/year. I want to share some random thoughts with you that I sense will help on your journey through this year and life entirely. I pray they mean something to you. Note: After today, the breakforth series will go on a break and will resume the first week of April. Thank you for following what we have done here hitherto.  So here we go... Make each day count - Who and what you are today is a cumulation of the decisions you have made every day of the past. Every new day, do your best to make meaningful decisions and be disciplined enough to follow through with them and you would have made the day count. Be thankful - Gratitude has a rippling effect; instead of complaining, be thankful, count your blessings, relish in the o

  Personally, the "LIFE - MAKE IT COUNT" series has been a blessing to me. It has challenged me, confronted me, and pushed me to be a better person on my journey of making my short life here on earth count. If you have been consistent in following this series, you will remember that we have talked about counting on God first, establishing good and healthy relationships as second to none, cultivating a worthy character, and having a good name. We also looked at the fact that integrity never grows old, the need to build capacity, thanksgiving as a way of life, and being comfortable in your skin. Other variables discussed are consistency, investing time, nurturing others, commitment, putting oneself out there, and leaving the past in the past.  I will want to wrap this series with one last issue that I see as the icing on the cake, without it, fulfilling all the above would be a facade. To make your life count, you have to pay the price of making life count. This entails knowing

  is going to be one of the shortest pieces in this series, but I dare to tell you that if you open your mind to the realities it carries, it will be the most liberating to you. In his book, " The purpose-driven life ", Rick Warren raised some important variables that drive people's lives. Among those variables were guilt, resentment and anger, and fear. Let me note here therefore that we are all driven by something - good or bad, from the past or the future.  To make your life count, I believe you have to leave the past in the past. Regardless of the experiences and encounters of the past, all you need to carry from there are the lessons learned. Truth is, a lot of people are living less and dragging through each day because they are still stuck in the past. For some, it could be guilt for what they have done, hence they find it hard to forgive themselves and receive forgiveness as well. For others, it is anger and resentment from an event of the past and they find it h